


When All She Wanted was the Universe

by charming_murderess



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hurt, Loss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-24
Updated: 2014-11-24
Packaged: 2018-02-26 21:14:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2666573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charming_murderess/pseuds/charming_murderess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ell was the only hope she didn't know she needed. Carmilla was the only adventure she has ever wanted. But Mother would never let it be. Defiance was always in Carmilla's nature but discipline was Mother's specialty.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When All She Wanted was the Universe

When the carriage toppled over and her mother had set up the next charade, Carmilla didn’t know that the next time she’d wake up she would come to see the universe dressed in full white regalia, smiling down upon her. The universe had a name and it was Ell. Her eyes were made of every star in the sky and her hair was made of sunlight, woven into silk strands by gods and goddesses. Carmilla’s lungs had forgotten what it felt like to be filled with air but suddenly, the universe smiled upon her and it felt like having life breathed back into her body.

She had been dead inside but Ell's kisses tasted like fire and it lit her up like a sunrise. Carmilla would take her hand first and always but it was always Ell who refused to let go. Carmilla could live in all of the eternities but none of them would be worthy if Ell did not exist.

So Carmilla asked her to run away with her. She was almost certain she could hear her dead heart beating, her voice dying out in her throat and she wished, she wished, she wished, that she would say yes. And when she did, she did it so lightly that Carmilla almost didn’t hear it but she could still feel her ears ringing from when they kissed and fireworks exploded inside of her tongue.

And how gallant was her efforts; for a creature of the night to steal away the universe in one sweeping feat, well that should’ve been so. For the universe wanted to envelope that creature and cradle its name in her bosom. It was those eyes of thunder she longed for, the rage of all the heavens contained inside. Oh, how Ell had loved her. She held her so dearly, so dearly, so close. She never had the audacity to reach for her but once she was hers she did not let go.

But on the night the universe and the storm were to escape, darkness fell upon them. The storm she loved had been revealed to be a monster and her heart ached at the untruth. Her tears were hot and her heart was broken but nothing hurt more when she saw her love pried away from her arms as she fought with all her might.

Ell had no understanding of the monster her Mother had painted her to be and confused as she was, every beat of her heart called for the storm it has been craving her whole life. She watched Carmilla get beaten to the ground and she felt every bone that broke, every muscle torn, every skin they scraped. She felt the fire and anger and she saw the storm for what it truly was and she was scared but her want did not ebb. Ell had tossed and screamed and fought as vigorously as her love, nails digging in to the skin of her captors as she fought to be one with Carmilla.

But the universe wasn’t as strong as she should’ve been and the storm’s anger was nothing in comparison to the monsters that held them apart. Her storm was not a monster and she cried for her and screamed for her and fought for her but she was only human and humans are weak and useless in contrast to centuries-old creatures of the night.

Carmilla fought with her teeth and claw, trying to get out of the coffin filled with blood her Mother has trapped her in but there was no success. Her universe watched her with angry tears, her voice was raw from screaming and fighting and Carmilla had hoped she was screaming for her, too. She could hear the absolute terror in her voice but perhaps she had missed the anger that came with it. She wanted to save her and save herself and in her head there was hope for a love that could alter the universe. But alas, she could only manage to endure the heart ache and it she thought how does her heart hurt this much when it's absolutely dead?

The universe had been angry at their twisted fate. She did not stop screaming, did not stop fighting, did not stop loving even until the light has swallowed her whole. Her last thoughts came up to the very being whose initial plan was to deliver her to the blasted place. She was angry, angry, angry but her longing for Carmilla had been stronger than any other emotion that passed through her body and she thought, how ironic was it to be delivered to absolute light when all she ever wanted was the storm.


End file.
